This is Jonathon

This is Jonathon's story.


This scar is from a hernia operation 5 years ago. It bothers me, both physically and emotionally...let me explain how. Physically the scar tissue itself hurts to the touch. I have a rare side effect of my surgery known as Post Hernia Pain Syndrome. Both the outer scar and the muscles underneath burn when I've been exerting. Days where I've been on my feet a lot, which are most as I love to walk, will often leave me feeling a pinch there. Sometimes this has been worse, occasionally to the point of not even being able to stand. Emotionally it is a constant reminder of weakness. I remember the trauma of the surgery that caused it, feeling like I couldn't survive another minute on the operating table. Feeling violated by the pushing and pulling as they so eloquently coin the sensation. I got the hernia during a karate class - something that has always been a passion of mine and now will never be an activity I can participate in the way I used to. Sexually, there was a while where I would feel great pain there afterwards, again a slap in the face making me feel weak and less than desirable. Ultimately I've been braving the pain which is less and less by the month, but I won't truly feel complete again until the remnants of the scar are completely gone.

Jonathan Robbins - actor

And this is what he said later: Those images are pretty fantastic. I wish the scar was more prominent, but I guess that's a benefit of doing this project for me - it helps me see how I perceive it much stronger than it actually is. That's a very wonderful thing about the camera - though it distorts and highlights based on the lens and settings, ultimately it does tell the truth, or some vision of it. And it reminds us how our own vision is just one, that doesn't necessarily have anything to do with the way others will see us.